Friday, March 24, 2006

Just a thought...

I'm beginning to think that there is something significantly wrong with my brain. Sometimes I sit down, look out whatever window is closest, and realize that another few months of my life has gone by. This happened twice today. I try to take stock of accomplishments, memories, and acquired knowledge and I always come up more or less empty handed. My relationship with Justin and it's progression is a very comforting constant.
Awakening #1 occurred at about 10:30AM when I was sitting at a desk in the Bath satellite office. I didn't realize that I was doing it until my supervisor cupped her hands around her mouth like a megaphone and called my name...three times. I was staring at the field out the window wishing that there was a cow to see.

Awakening #2 occurred at about, well, right now. I decided to write this post because of it.

Generally speaking, I suppose that it's OK for time to pass, however I would prefer for it to stop and allow me to gather myself. I feel as though I run to keep up, and then I always forget to stop and do what I need to do. It's a regular occurrence for people to tell me that I've said and done things that I have absolutely no recollection of. This is most likely because I was too busy worrying that time was passing to make a memory of the given event.

Things that I need to do include: Tell the people that I love that I love them; Spend as much time with said people as I possibly can before one or all of them dies; Get a cat; Take care of my body; Breathe; Enjoy the moments that I'm living in; GET A NEW JOB (the uppercase means that this is a PRIORITY, unfortunately I don't have time to make it one)....

There are more, I just am too tired to list them right now.

My attempts to cope with this situation I find myself in are usually interpreted as "Diane being crazy." This makes me sad.